hello readers, i gotta say this week has had ups and downs, cold nights and unpredictable weather.
EDUCATION VS. KNOWLEDGE. i have been doing alot of thinking this recently, first, is education the best investment? well, i got indulge some of my learned friends and colleagues. the debates were very informative and full of drama even more than parliament arguing over stupid scandals. i came to a conclusion that education isn't the best investment but know is! university or a degree doesn't educate someone on how to survive in such economies and generation. one has to deal with frequent inflation, insecurity, government officials asking for bribes, competition and less demand of products and services. real life teachers you how to cope with such pressures and emerging trends. i believe knowledge is the best investment one can make. knowledge can be learned practically and theoritically and put into deserving use. always choose wise the path you take in life using knowledge as a background although education helps you control your destiny too. education is important too.
SUGAR. i am a kenyan and one thing i hate doing at the moment is shopping. inflation and scarcity of essential commodities had rockets their prices to new heights. sugar is damn expensive and i blame it on the goverment. our government for the last one year has been making and implementing bad policies without doing its research well. they blocked the importation of duty free sugar thus causing chaos in the market. their arguement is that we need to support local sugar manufacturers who cant even supply the demand. do something parliament before you kill some of us.
SEX. their is a new trend thats going around that people prefer having casual sex and avoiding relationships. they say that rships have alot of pressure and hustles and pockets/bank accounts get hurt in the process. i kinda agree with these sentiments but am also a firm believer in true love. their is that one special person for you out their. courting a lady has become expensive and most of us have no jobs/source of income to facilitate courtship. no wonder married men are giving us a hard time with our young ladies who prefer not to work, live lavishly and get their degrees with hustles. they think when the time comes for marriage they will find us here waiting for them but they are mistaken, most of us will also date the younger ladies. what goes around comes around dear ladies. young guys are trying really hard to live up to the expectations but they need encouragement and support which is rare. i guess we have to embrace the new trend of having sex without strings attached then.
SOCIAL NETWORKS. they are apart of our lives and we must embrace them though to much of everything is dangerous. be careful who you meet and who you open up to, afterall big brother is recording.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
5 Financial Mistakes That Ruin Your Marriage
There is always some truth in a joke and looking back on this saying as an adult, it is obvious that he was steering me toward what he hoped was a happy life rather than a life of what he perceived would be a struggle. He is old fashioned and didn't think that a girl could create her own financial security (that is fodder for another blog) but his intentions were good.
Money and marriage is an age old problem. However, during good or bad economic times some things never change — couples are still fighting about money. In many cases, they are the very same things couples were fighting about 25 years ago. According to research as well as my own experience working with couples and money, here are the top five money conflicts that lead to marital strife and ultimately divorce.
Materialism — valuing "things" or money over the relationship. Research on marriage has shown that couples who are materialistic rate at the bottom of the happiness scale. A recent study by BYU and William Jefferson University found that spouses who were BOTH materialistic were worse off on nearly every relationship measure they looked at. It wasn't the lack of money that was the culprit; the authors found that it was materialism itself that created much of the difficulty even when couples had plenty of money.
I saw this firsthand with a former client of mine named Yolanda who unknowingly fell into the materialism trap and nearly destroyed her marriage because of it. She is a first generation American with immigrant parents from Guatemala. She had a misguided notion in her head that if she had a beautiful home nicely decorated with a formal dining room and a landscaped yard for her family to live in then she would be happy. It was almost as if she had a picture of the American Dream and she had to step into that picture and become that person to be happy.
She insisted her husband buy a home they could barely afford along with Ethan Allen furniture and a landscaped backyard — going into debt to do it. This may not seem like materialism because we are not talking diamonds and furs here. We are talking about a dining room table but none-the-less, her focus was on accumulating things instead of on her marriage and family. Fortunately for her, this story doesn't end tragically. When her mother passed away, something triggered in her that completely changed her outlook on her values. She got a much needed wake-up call about what was really important in life before it was too late.
Having conflicting money values. Now I don't know about you but if I was married to someone who gambled away money I'd have a really hard time with that. I see gambling as foolish (unless you are good enough to get into the World Series of Poker.) Foolishly spending money is the number one financial cause for divorce. According to Jeffrey Dew's paper titled Bank on it: Thrifty Couples are the Happiest, when a spouse feels the other spends their money foolishly, it increases the likelihood of divorce by 45%. What caught my attention in the report was the word "feeling." The researchers tell us that perceptions of how well one's spouse handles money play a role in shaping the quality and stability of family life in the U.S.
It isn't just about gambling either. A former client of mine, I'll call her Sandy, was married to someone who was incredibly frugal. Her husband used to check what she paid for groceries and compare them to the weekly ads to see if she got the best price. He actually would be angry and chastise Sandy because she paid too much for a block of cheese saying, "You could have gotten this cheaper at Safeway." He actually wanted her to go to two different stores to shop (even though she worked full time and they had two little boys.) Their marriage ended in divorce and not because she was a gambler by any means but because he perceived her spending as foolish.
The answer here is for couples to come together and decide on how to spend their money. Coming up with jointly held values obviously involves some give and take. If you like to buy lottery tickets, which your spouse sees as frivolous but you feel, "you can't win if you don't play," then jointly decide on a spending limit that you can agree on.
Adopting traditional roles when they don't fit. The commonly held belief that men should handle the financial planning and investments in the family and the women should take care of the day-to-day finances may not fit every couple. In fact, in my household, my husband manages the cash flow — he can be very detail oriented, which is painfully obvious when he is talking baseball with his buddies. It is amazing to me that he knows the batting average of players who retired 5 years ago! He is much better with our cash flow and I am more suited for our strategic financial planning. This is not simply because I have a financial background, but studies on the human brain have shown women to be hard wired to multi-task and those skills cross over to strategic planning. In our case, we switched roles and it works beautifully.
The key is to find the right person for the right role based on aptitude not gender.
Having opposing money styles. It is not uncommon to see financial opposites attract one another. Couples often have mismatched money styles — one is a spender while the other is a saver. Instead of having them work against each other, causing fights and tension, successful couples don't try to change each other. They adapt their money styles to work for both of them. In a previous blog, I mentioned how a newlywed couple set up a plan that made the most of their opposite tendencies. Paula loves her husband's sense of adventure and fun but on the flip-side he spends every dime he has doing it. He loves her stability and discipline since it balances his free and relaxed nature but he is always asking her for money and wanting to tap into her savings. There is tension and resentment on each side.
We came up with a plan that takes their natural money styles into account so they can work together toward common goals and they both contribute financially. The plan is — the spender spends and the saver saves. He is in charge of the short term emergency savings and unexpected expenses that come up. He doesn't feel concerned when he has to tap into the emergency fund and since he is saving monthly, it gets replenished regularly with automatic transfers from checking to savings. She is in charge of long term goals — retirement, saving for a down payment for a house and saving for annual vacations. She hates to part with their hard earned savings so she is best suited for the big goals that take more discipline in achieving.
The key here is instead of judging each other and essentially working against each other, row in the same direction.
Magical thinking — getting results without a plan. One of the most undervalued yet important reasons to work with a financial planner is to force couples to develop a plan together and, at minimum, review it annually. Some people have some of the individual pieces of their finances in order but having a plan puts the pieces together. Couples who don't have a plan don't have a chance of meeting their goals.
The do-it-yourselfer can do the same thing, of course, but it takes a little more discipline. Either way, developing a financial plan gets couples moving in the same direction toward goals they have developed together. Over the course of my 25 years as a financial planner, I've seen a significant difference with couples meeting their goals — being able to retire, touring Europe, investing in vacation properties, etc because they planned, reviewed their plans annually and worked as a team.
Couples who improve their attitudes about money and their communication can truly have it all. Since finances are the biggest cause of stress (a 2010 APA study found that 76% of Americans see money as a source of stress in their lives) and stress is a major cause of disease, improving financial literacy also has the added benefit of improving your health. Keeping your values in the right place and improving finances can actually bring health, wealth and happiness. What more can we ask for?
Materialism — valuing "things" or money over the relationship. Research on marriage has shown that couples who are materialistic rate at the bottom of the happiness scale. A recent study by BYU and William Jefferson University found that spouses who were BOTH materialistic were worse off on nearly every relationship measure they looked at. It wasn't the lack of money that was the culprit; the authors found that it was materialism itself that created much of the difficulty even when couples had plenty of money.
I saw this firsthand with a former client of mine named Yolanda who unknowingly fell into the materialism trap and nearly destroyed her marriage because of it. She is a first generation American with immigrant parents from Guatemala. She had a misguided notion in her head that if she had a beautiful home nicely decorated with a formal dining room and a landscaped yard for her family to live in then she would be happy. It was almost as if she had a picture of the American Dream and she had to step into that picture and become that person to be happy.
She insisted her husband buy a home they could barely afford along with Ethan Allen furniture and a landscaped backyard — going into debt to do it. This may not seem like materialism because we are not talking diamonds and furs here. We are talking about a dining room table but none-the-less, her focus was on accumulating things instead of on her marriage and family. Fortunately for her, this story doesn't end tragically. When her mother passed away, something triggered in her that completely changed her outlook on her values. She got a much needed wake-up call about what was really important in life before it was too late.
Having conflicting money values. Now I don't know about you but if I was married to someone who gambled away money I'd have a really hard time with that. I see gambling as foolish (unless you are good enough to get into the World Series of Poker.) Foolishly spending money is the number one financial cause for divorce. According to Jeffrey Dew's paper titled Bank on it: Thrifty Couples are the Happiest, when a spouse feels the other spends their money foolishly, it increases the likelihood of divorce by 45%. What caught my attention in the report was the word "feeling." The researchers tell us that perceptions of how well one's spouse handles money play a role in shaping the quality and stability of family life in the U.S.
It isn't just about gambling either. A former client of mine, I'll call her Sandy, was married to someone who was incredibly frugal. Her husband used to check what she paid for groceries and compare them to the weekly ads to see if she got the best price. He actually would be angry and chastise Sandy because she paid too much for a block of cheese saying, "You could have gotten this cheaper at Safeway." He actually wanted her to go to two different stores to shop (even though she worked full time and they had two little boys.) Their marriage ended in divorce and not because she was a gambler by any means but because he perceived her spending as foolish.
The answer here is for couples to come together and decide on how to spend their money. Coming up with jointly held values obviously involves some give and take. If you like to buy lottery tickets, which your spouse sees as frivolous but you feel, "you can't win if you don't play," then jointly decide on a spending limit that you can agree on.
Adopting traditional roles when they don't fit. The commonly held belief that men should handle the financial planning and investments in the family and the women should take care of the day-to-day finances may not fit every couple. In fact, in my household, my husband manages the cash flow — he can be very detail oriented, which is painfully obvious when he is talking baseball with his buddies. It is amazing to me that he knows the batting average of players who retired 5 years ago! He is much better with our cash flow and I am more suited for our strategic financial planning. This is not simply because I have a financial background, but studies on the human brain have shown women to be hard wired to multi-task and those skills cross over to strategic planning. In our case, we switched roles and it works beautifully.
The key is to find the right person for the right role based on aptitude not gender.
Having opposing money styles. It is not uncommon to see financial opposites attract one another. Couples often have mismatched money styles — one is a spender while the other is a saver. Instead of having them work against each other, causing fights and tension, successful couples don't try to change each other. They adapt their money styles to work for both of them. In a previous blog, I mentioned how a newlywed couple set up a plan that made the most of their opposite tendencies. Paula loves her husband's sense of adventure and fun but on the flip-side he spends every dime he has doing it. He loves her stability and discipline since it balances his free and relaxed nature but he is always asking her for money and wanting to tap into her savings. There is tension and resentment on each side.
We came up with a plan that takes their natural money styles into account so they can work together toward common goals and they both contribute financially. The plan is — the spender spends and the saver saves. He is in charge of the short term emergency savings and unexpected expenses that come up. He doesn't feel concerned when he has to tap into the emergency fund and since he is saving monthly, it gets replenished regularly with automatic transfers from checking to savings. She is in charge of long term goals — retirement, saving for a down payment for a house and saving for annual vacations. She hates to part with their hard earned savings so she is best suited for the big goals that take more discipline in achieving.
The key here is instead of judging each other and essentially working against each other, row in the same direction.
Magical thinking — getting results without a plan. One of the most undervalued yet important reasons to work with a financial planner is to force couples to develop a plan together and, at minimum, review it annually. Some people have some of the individual pieces of their finances in order but having a plan puts the pieces together. Couples who don't have a plan don't have a chance of meeting their goals.
The do-it-yourselfer can do the same thing, of course, but it takes a little more discipline. Either way, developing a financial plan gets couples moving in the same direction toward goals they have developed together. Over the course of my 25 years as a financial planner, I've seen a significant difference with couples meeting their goals — being able to retire, touring Europe, investing in vacation properties, etc because they planned, reviewed their plans annually and worked as a team.
Couples who improve their attitudes about money and their communication can truly have it all. Since finances are the biggest cause of stress (a 2010 APA study found that 76% of Americans see money as a source of stress in their lives) and stress is a major cause of disease, improving financial literacy also has the added benefit of improving your health. Keeping your values in the right place and improving finances can actually bring health, wealth and happiness. What more can we ask for?
Sunday, November 13, 2011
6 Ways to FOREVER Banish the "Let's Just be Friends" Speech
So what is the answer to one of the most commonly
asked question in dating ever since the beginning
of time:
How do I turn a friend in to a lover?
Simple.
It's all a matter of know when when and how to
play your cards right with your target of choice.
These are my 6-steps to get you out of the friend
zone and get women sexually interested in you...
.
1. Limit your availability.
I'm willing to bet that whenever this girl does
call you, you eagerly answer the phone and chat
with her for as long as she wants.
You THINK that when you spend two hours on the
phone with her, sharing your life stories and
telling her about the girl who broke your heart
when you were in the tenth grade, you're building
some kind of deep "connection" with her.
But what you're actually doing is removing ANY
sense of mystery about yourself, and letting her
know that you have nothing else going in your l
ife... and no other women.
This is massively UN-attractive to her.
(I know that when you're a man who is struggling
with his dating life, and haven't hooked up with
a chick in a while, this takes a LOT of
discipline.
Your instinct is to make yourself totally
available to her and try to spend as much time
as possible with her. Well, go ahead and keep
doing it this way, if you want to keep wondering
why women keep placing you in the friend zone...)
.
2. Until you've slept with a woman, limit your
phone chats with her to five minutes.
And don't get caught up in constant text-messaging.
Give her the sense that you're a busy man with
places to be.
Use these short phone calls, or text exchanges,
to lock down your plans to see her again.
Save the deep conversations for when you are
actually spending time with her.
.
3. Women are moody and emotional.
Get used to it, and know how to deal with it.
When she start acting weird or distant, she is
testing you.
She wants to see how you will respond.
Do you kiss her ass and ask her "what's wrong?"
Do you get frustrated and angered by her
behavior?
(Either of these responses will only make her
get more moody!)
Or, do you behave like a firm, direct MAN?
(Tell her, "Well, I can tell you've got some
things on your mind right now, so why don't you
take some time to sort it out and get back to
me.
I've got some things I need to handle right
now.")
.
4. Her ex-boyfriend is irrelevant.
Women commonly use the excuse:
"I got out of a bad relationship recently, I
don't know if I'm ready for someone new, I
don't want to get hurt again," etc.
It's all crap, basically.
The truth is, if she met a confident,
attractive man RIGHT NOW who made her feel a
sexual connection, she'd forget about her
ex-boyfriend in about 2.3 seconds.
When she talks about her ex, and how she's
"not ready," what she really means is that
you're not making her feel attraction, and
so she's testing you to see what kind of man
you are.
You need to put her in a positive, fun state
of mind and keep her there. When she thinks
of you, she should think of fun times and
feeling good about herself.
The last thing you want to do is allow her
to dwell on her ex-boyfriend and be her
"shoulder to cry on."
If she ever mentions him, change the
subject.
And never refer to him by name because it
only aggravates her emotional state.
(Instead, refer to him as "that guy." Make
him seem irrelevant and insignificant.)
HER: "I guess I'm just in a bad mood today
because it would have been my third
anniversary with my ex, John..."
YOU: "Well it sounds like that guy didn't
appreciate you the way he should have, and
it's his loss.
I'm just glad we're getting to
know each other, because I can tell there's
a lot more to you than meets the eye.
So tell me more about ________"
(Change the subject onto something that gets
her in a positive, talkative mood).
.
5. Never confess your attraction to her.
Women interpret this as a sign of weakness.
You've been taught by the media that woman
want a soft, sensitive guy who isn't afraid to
confess his feelings.
Actually, the opposite is true.
She needs to know you are a strong, emotionally
secure and confident MAN.
Once you've got a sexual relationship going
with her, and she's bonded to you, feel free to
be a sweet, loving boyfriend and do all of the
romantic things that drive her wild.
But until then, you've got to play it cool.
.
6. Finally, be willing to "man up" and walk away.
If for whatever reason she just can't sort out
her feelings, cut her loose.
Trust me, if you were involved with two or three
OTHER women right now, you wouldn't have the
time or the interest to play games with some
chick who can't make up her mind.
When you have multiple options, you will ALWAYS
feel confident and in control.
Don't make the mistake that most guys make, and
place "all of your eggs in one basket."
This is also one of the biggest mistakes guys make
when they want to turn a friend into something more.
They focus too much on that one girl.
Once a woman has mentally placed you in "The
Friend Zone," it's difficult to change her
feelings towards you.
Ideally, you never want to her to view you as
her platonic, non-sexual "buddy" in the first
place.
This is why when you do meet up with women for a
date, you've got to take things in a sexual
direction.
This doesn't mean you have to sleep with women
on the first date.
But you MUST establish some physical contact and
make her feel that you're a sexual possibility
for her.
That's the difference between guys who always
suffer in the "Friend Zone," and guys who GET IT
DONE.
If you're constantly pulling your hair out trying
to figure out how to get that ONE SPECIAL GIRL
you've always fantasized about (but she ONLY
treats you as a friend/brother and NOTHING else),
go to this site to learn how to CHANGE HER MIND
and turn the tables IMMEDIATELY:
asked question in dating ever since the beginning
of time:
How do I turn a friend in to a lover?
Simple.
It's all a matter of know when when and how to
play your cards right with your target of choice.
These are my 6-steps to get you out of the friend
zone and get women sexually interested in you...
.
1. Limit your availability.
I'm willing to bet that whenever this girl does
call you, you eagerly answer the phone and chat
with her for as long as she wants.
You THINK that when you spend two hours on the
phone with her, sharing your life stories and
telling her about the girl who broke your heart
when you were in the tenth grade, you're building
some kind of deep "connection" with her.
But what you're actually doing is removing ANY
sense of mystery about yourself, and letting her
know that you have nothing else going in your l
ife... and no other women.
This is massively UN-attractive to her.
(I know that when you're a man who is struggling
with his dating life, and haven't hooked up with
a chick in a while, this takes a LOT of
discipline.
Your instinct is to make yourself totally
available to her and try to spend as much time
as possible with her. Well, go ahead and keep
doing it this way, if you want to keep wondering
why women keep placing you in the friend zone...)
.
2. Until you've slept with a woman, limit your
phone chats with her to five minutes.
And don't get caught up in constant text-messaging.
Give her the sense that you're a busy man with
places to be.
Use these short phone calls, or text exchanges,
to lock down your plans to see her again.
Save the deep conversations for when you are
actually spending time with her.
.
3. Women are moody and emotional.
Get used to it, and know how to deal with it.
When she start acting weird or distant, she is
testing you.
She wants to see how you will respond.
Do you kiss her ass and ask her "what's wrong?"
Do you get frustrated and angered by her
behavior?
(Either of these responses will only make her
get more moody!)
Or, do you behave like a firm, direct MAN?
(Tell her, "Well, I can tell you've got some
things on your mind right now, so why don't you
take some time to sort it out and get back to
me.
I've got some things I need to handle right
now.")
.
4. Her ex-boyfriend is irrelevant.
Women commonly use the excuse:
"I got out of a bad relationship recently, I
don't know if I'm ready for someone new, I
don't want to get hurt again," etc.
It's all crap, basically.
The truth is, if she met a confident,
attractive man RIGHT NOW who made her feel a
sexual connection, she'd forget about her
ex-boyfriend in about 2.3 seconds.
When she talks about her ex, and how she's
"not ready," what she really means is that
you're not making her feel attraction, and
so she's testing you to see what kind of man
you are.
You need to put her in a positive, fun state
of mind and keep her there. When she thinks
of you, she should think of fun times and
feeling good about herself.
The last thing you want to do is allow her
to dwell on her ex-boyfriend and be her
"shoulder to cry on."
If she ever mentions him, change the
subject.
And never refer to him by name because it
only aggravates her emotional state.
(Instead, refer to him as "that guy." Make
him seem irrelevant and insignificant.)
HER: "I guess I'm just in a bad mood today
because it would have been my third
anniversary with my ex, John..."
YOU: "Well it sounds like that guy didn't
appreciate you the way he should have, and
it's his loss.
I'm just glad we're getting to
know each other, because I can tell there's
a lot more to you than meets the eye.
So tell me more about ________"
(Change the subject onto something that gets
her in a positive, talkative mood).
.
5. Never confess your attraction to her.
Women interpret this as a sign of weakness.
You've been taught by the media that woman
want a soft, sensitive guy who isn't afraid to
confess his feelings.
Actually, the opposite is true.
She needs to know you are a strong, emotionally
secure and confident MAN.
Once you've got a sexual relationship going
with her, and she's bonded to you, feel free to
be a sweet, loving boyfriend and do all of the
romantic things that drive her wild.
But until then, you've got to play it cool.
.
6. Finally, be willing to "man up" and walk away.
If for whatever reason she just can't sort out
her feelings, cut her loose.
Trust me, if you were involved with two or three
OTHER women right now, you wouldn't have the
time or the interest to play games with some
chick who can't make up her mind.
When you have multiple options, you will ALWAYS
feel confident and in control.
Don't make the mistake that most guys make, and
place "all of your eggs in one basket."
This is also one of the biggest mistakes guys make
when they want to turn a friend into something more.
They focus too much on that one girl.
Once a woman has mentally placed you in "The
Friend Zone," it's difficult to change her
feelings towards you.
Ideally, you never want to her to view you as
her platonic, non-sexual "buddy" in the first
place.
This is why when you do meet up with women for a
date, you've got to take things in a sexual
direction.
This doesn't mean you have to sleep with women
on the first date.
But you MUST establish some physical contact and
make her feel that you're a sexual possibility
for her.
That's the difference between guys who always
suffer in the "Friend Zone," and guys who GET IT
DONE.
If you're constantly pulling your hair out trying
to figure out how to get that ONE SPECIAL GIRL
you've always fantasized about (but she ONLY
treats you as a friend/brother and NOTHING else),
go to this site to learn how to CHANGE HER MIND
and turn the tables IMMEDIATELY:
Saturday, November 12, 2011
BITTER SWEET THOUGHTS
whoever said, "the world evolves around money" knwe what they were saying. YES, I AM BROKE sitted after working hours on a saturday blogging. am just browsing and tweeting and all i can see is people telling the world how much fun they are having and am wondering if am still in planet earth. Well, when will i ever have money is a question i might never answer. onr thing is i know is that i will move mountains with money if i ever get it.
the sky is always the limit but money facilitates that, with money comes confidence, respect, honour, power, control and one gets to know their true potential. i dont believe in the saying that "more money more problems" because with money i can solve very many problems. Am yet to hear of a billionaire who hates and regrets being rich.
now to more simpler issues, 1. how the hell do i get a girlfriend in the city of the sun? money is a requirement although most ladies will argue that am mistaken. i have been around the block to know what am writing. ladies have become so materialistic nowadays, i had a chat with a friend and she argued that a lady must look good and its a man's responsibility to make sure of that. how the hell can a man do so if he doesnt have a source of income or extra money to do so. i think ladies are ot being realistic and just wonna live the easy life. well, their are plenty of men out their with money but i doubt they are looking to love and appreciate you all the time with giving them something in return. no wonder married men are giving young guys competition when it comes to this young beautiful ladies. the old days are gone when a lady would go crazy for a guy who loves her unconditionally no matter his achievements or short comings. no wonder no man feels like treat a lady like royalty all the time. i also feel pity for my age mates because in the next 5-7 years they will be lonly with men to love and adore them. personally i know what in a woman and cant seem to find it and am guessing i wont in the future.
most young men prefer older women not for money but for free drama life they have, older women have class and know what it takes to keep a man around. commitment and sacrifice is what these young ladies lack. i know most guys have girlfriends but how long does the relationship last nowadays, everyone wants what they dont have and its killing love and bliss.
i always say that the woman i get to marry will be lucky because i will love her with all my heart. love is kind, passion, romance, support, struggling together, discovering the world together, sleeping and waking up together etc. i look up to my aunts and their hubbies because of how they hold their families together.
UNTIL THAT DAY COMES WHEN I GET HER, i will be patient and blog alot about love....bla bla bla bla bla.......
ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND PALS
the sky is always the limit but money facilitates that, with money comes confidence, respect, honour, power, control and one gets to know their true potential. i dont believe in the saying that "more money more problems" because with money i can solve very many problems. Am yet to hear of a billionaire who hates and regrets being rich.
now to more simpler issues, 1. how the hell do i get a girlfriend in the city of the sun? money is a requirement although most ladies will argue that am mistaken. i have been around the block to know what am writing. ladies have become so materialistic nowadays, i had a chat with a friend and she argued that a lady must look good and its a man's responsibility to make sure of that. how the hell can a man do so if he doesnt have a source of income or extra money to do so. i think ladies are ot being realistic and just wonna live the easy life. well, their are plenty of men out their with money but i doubt they are looking to love and appreciate you all the time with giving them something in return. no wonder married men are giving young guys competition when it comes to this young beautiful ladies. the old days are gone when a lady would go crazy for a guy who loves her unconditionally no matter his achievements or short comings. no wonder no man feels like treat a lady like royalty all the time. i also feel pity for my age mates because in the next 5-7 years they will be lonly with men to love and adore them. personally i know what in a woman and cant seem to find it and am guessing i wont in the future.
most young men prefer older women not for money but for free drama life they have, older women have class and know what it takes to keep a man around. commitment and sacrifice is what these young ladies lack. i know most guys have girlfriends but how long does the relationship last nowadays, everyone wants what they dont have and its killing love and bliss.
i always say that the woman i get to marry will be lucky because i will love her with all my heart. love is kind, passion, romance, support, struggling together, discovering the world together, sleeping and waking up together etc. i look up to my aunts and their hubbies because of how they hold their families together.
UNTIL THAT DAY COMES WHEN I GET HER, i will be patient and blog alot about love....bla bla bla bla bla.......
ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND PALS
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
A LADY
am 23 years old but with being so young, one thing i understand and know is women.i can blog a million words about a woman with putting fullstops and comas. Here is what i think a woman is;
1. a lady needs security- i dont mean the physical one but the security of knowing everything will be atleast ok. she needs someone to hold her hand in thick and thin. well if you are a man who doesn't fit here then prep yourself for a heartbreak.
2. a lady needs maturity- a woman loves attention and if her man is the same then alot of drama will be the order of the day. a lady needs a mature man who she can rely on for advice, help and fulfillment of emotional and physical needs.
3. a lady needs to feel like a queen all the time- i really don't need to explain this one but just know that the small things in life matter the most to her. helping out with the dishes, baby, relatives and helping her understand herself every minute of the day. eg. if you take her for dinner, then you get to watch her choose something exotic from the menu and watch her sample it. if she likes it then its a win for you.
4. a lady needs to be adored and appreciated- a woman can be compared to a lambo, you need to adore and appreciate her every day and thats where number 2 and 3 also come in.
5. a lady needs love- as a man you needs to make sure your woman gets love from the society, both sides of the family and your own family. love makes her happy and when she is happy everyone is happy.
6.a lady needs space and freedom- men have one for the road with the guys and so does a lady with her girlfriend. lets her enjoy her time alone sometimes. she gets to catch up with others and to also miss you.
7.a lady needs child- people may think this isn't important but it is. she needs to feel whole and not cursed. just like men need baby boys.
8.a lady needs GOD-with God, a lady gets to mould her and the family's identity.
9.a lady needs understanding- you have to be patient, caring and listen to her. they talk and quarell alot. hehehehe
10.a lady needs submission too- dear men, take time off from being the boss sometimes and let her be in charge. she gets to enjoy torturing and toying with you.
KENYAN LAD
1. a lady needs security- i dont mean the physical one but the security of knowing everything will be atleast ok. she needs someone to hold her hand in thick and thin. well if you are a man who doesn't fit here then prep yourself for a heartbreak.
2. a lady needs maturity- a woman loves attention and if her man is the same then alot of drama will be the order of the day. a lady needs a mature man who she can rely on for advice, help and fulfillment of emotional and physical needs.
3. a lady needs to feel like a queen all the time- i really don't need to explain this one but just know that the small things in life matter the most to her. helping out with the dishes, baby, relatives and helping her understand herself every minute of the day. eg. if you take her for dinner, then you get to watch her choose something exotic from the menu and watch her sample it. if she likes it then its a win for you.
4. a lady needs to be adored and appreciated- a woman can be compared to a lambo, you need to adore and appreciate her every day and thats where number 2 and 3 also come in.
5. a lady needs love- as a man you needs to make sure your woman gets love from the society, both sides of the family and your own family. love makes her happy and when she is happy everyone is happy.
6.a lady needs space and freedom- men have one for the road with the guys and so does a lady with her girlfriend. lets her enjoy her time alone sometimes. she gets to catch up with others and to also miss you.
7.a lady needs child- people may think this isn't important but it is. she needs to feel whole and not cursed. just like men need baby boys.
8.a lady needs GOD-with God, a lady gets to mould her and the family's identity.
9.a lady needs understanding- you have to be patient, caring and listen to her. they talk and quarell alot. hehehehe
10.a lady needs submission too- dear men, take time off from being the boss sometimes and let her be in charge. she gets to enjoy torturing and toying with you.
KENYAN LAD
Monday, August 22, 2011
7 Steps for Dominating ANY Social Scene
| An incredible social life is the cornerstone of a successful dating life. It's a simple equation: More people = more opportunities = More girls But what can you do if you're a guy who doesn't have a great social life? Well there's a couple of solutions. In the fact, I've perfected a simple 7-step system for dominating ANY social encounter: . Step #1 - Call your friends The first step is to provide a simple baseline for the rest of this plan. Right now, you probably have a core group of friends who are part of your social circle. If you want to meet more people then you're going to start with this group. So the initial thing to do is call up your friends and make plans to do something different. The key is to organize an event which brings you out of your comfort zone and make you fun stuff. In other words, you want to start going to places which provide a social environment. . Step # 2- Look for hidden opportunities As you become more social you're going the likelihood of getting invited to different events. Due to inertia, most guys avoid "uncomfortable environments." Instead of doing this, you should start going to these events EVEN if you don't think they'll be fun. The truth is you never know what'll happen when you try different things. Perhaps the most boring event could provide a chance to meet an interesting girl. So never pass up an invitation to an event. The rule of thumb is if you don't have plans, you'll ALWAYS accept an invitation to do something. . Step # 3- Make friends While it's great to have old friends, your social life can get a real shot in the arm if you start making new friends at the events you're frequenting. One piece of advice I recommend is to talk to EVERYONE at these events. Even if it's a bunch of guys, you can still get a lot of social mileage by talking to people who have connections. Even the most mundane person probably knows a few attractive women. By making connections with everyone, you're giving yourself opportunities to find new friends and meet more girls. Here's a video that explains how to make an INSTANT connection with any girl you've met: ==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/ . Step #4- Keep contact with your new friends I like to think of friends as currency. The more you have, the more you opportunities you'll accumulate. As you meet new people, you'll start to build momentum on the number of buddies you'll acquire. In order to maximize your opportunities, you should maintain constant contact with the friends that you're making. Even if you're just sending a quick email, a consistent correspondence with your friends will improve your social life. By communicating with your friends you'll stick out in their minds when a cool event is about to happen. . Step #5- Keep up to date Almost every area has lots of fun stuff happening. The problem is most guys won't bother to look for them. Instead they're satisfied with doing the same thing over and over. Don't be like these guys. Instead become the man who is up to date on all events happening in your area. All you have to do is open you're local paper and you'll have access to dozens, even hundreds of fun things going on. Right now, commit yourself to spending a few minutes each week looking for interesting events going on in your area. . Step #6- Plan events It's human nature to want to be around fun people. So if you become the guy who plans out the fun times then you'll become the focal point of your social circle. What you want to do is plan out a few different interesting activities EACH month and invite everyone that you know. Eventually the people in your social life will look to you to plan out the good times. Over time, you can use these events to meet interesting women. Again, this is critical part of being a social master that's naturally attractive to women: ==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/ . Step #7- Be fun Finally, you have to go beyond being the guy who plans out fun events. At all times, you must display a fun and interesting personality. When you attend social activities, you should be regarded as the guy who can make others have a good time. The truth is most people live boring lives. If you're the source of interesting experiences then people will want to hang out with you. The end result is you'll become the first person they call when they want to have a fun night. Improving your social life is one of the crucial elements for meeting and dating a lot of women. If you follow the seven rules I just discussed, then you'll discover that it's pretty easy to transform into a fun guy who has an incredible social life. |
3 Questions That Make Her Want To Sleep With You
In addition to trust building, also ensure that you're at a place
CLOSE to her (for example, you and her alone at your place with no
interruption, etc).
3 Questions To Sex" Methodology
Question 1: "What excites you when it comes to sex?"
For example, if she says, "It makes me feel LOVED", then follow up
with this question:-
Question 2: "So what does feeling LOVED (or any other value she
answered with) give you?"
This is the indication that makes her know that she has achieved
what she wants from sex. Let's say she answers with, "I feel CLOSE
to the person that I am with."
Question 3: "What it is like when you're intimately CLOSE with this
person (point at yourself), where you can feel your skin brushing
against his skin (use sensual languaging!)...?"
Her: "It's warm, cozy... and it makes me feel alive."
Now, repeat it all back to her: "Let's say you're with this man who
you feel intimately CLOSE with... and you feel his skin brushing
against yours... it's something that makes you feel loved and
warm... and you feel ALIVE..."
Women get turned on by having them DESCRIBE the feelings of sex
(and female orgasms). Ultimately, you want her to FEEL the
sensation of sex IN HER BODY. Getting her to TALK about her
FEELINGS during sex is the ultimate SHORTCUT to make her feel
aroused.
Look...
Despite what taught elsewhere, seduction does NOT have to be slow,
complicated and tedious. For the ultimate SHORTCUT to seduction
success, check this out -
KENYAN LAD
CLOSE to her (for example, you and her alone at your place with no
interruption, etc).
3 Questions To Sex" Methodology
Question 1: "What excites you when it comes to sex?"
For example, if she says, "It makes me feel LOVED", then follow up
with this question:-
Question 2: "So what does feeling LOVED (or any other value she
answered with) give you?"
This is the indication that makes her know that she has achieved
what she wants from sex. Let's say she answers with, "I feel CLOSE
to the person that I am with."
Question 3: "What it is like when you're intimately CLOSE with this
person (point at yourself), where you can feel your skin brushing
against his skin (use sensual languaging!)...?"
Her: "It's warm, cozy... and it makes me feel alive."
Now, repeat it all back to her: "Let's say you're with this man who
you feel intimately CLOSE with... and you feel his skin brushing
against yours... it's something that makes you feel loved and
warm... and you feel ALIVE..."
Women get turned on by having them DESCRIBE the feelings of sex
(and female orgasms). Ultimately, you want her to FEEL the
sensation of sex IN HER BODY. Getting her to TALK about her
FEELINGS during sex is the ultimate SHORTCUT to make her feel
aroused.
Look...
Despite what taught elsewhere, seduction does NOT have to be slow,
complicated and tedious. For the ultimate SHORTCUT to seduction
success, check this out -
KENYAN LAD
Thursday, August 18, 2011
LIFE IS SHORT
My colleague passed away three weeks ago after being hit by a bus 500 meters from his home, by good luck we were always in good terms and open in all matters wether personal or official. he taught me that patience is the most vital value one can possess and always the key to happiness.he always boosted of how he had found the perfect woman and was ready to settle and was planning to wed on november and start a family. R.I.P KEVIN, you will always live on in our hurts.
LOVE can be defined in many ways but it depends on an individual. i was in a four relationship and mennn it was crazy. the normal up and downs were usually there but mostly we were good together and much in love. the real problems started when my partner go a job while i was studying, she never had time and when free she went out with her girlfriends. 3 months down the line i discovered she was cheating on me with her boss (bulgarian). most of her friends knew and never told me or even drop a hint. i had my doubts but i always told myself she would not do that to me because tulikuwa tumetoka mbali.
i came to find out about the affair after she had dumped me via sms, i felt i was at the end of the road and almost killed myself. after being accused of making her miserable by everyone i let it go and hoped one day i would move on. i became a loner because i could share a table with my friends because they knew and never said anything, it took time to heal form the heartbreak and betrayal but i finally let it go.
from their i went into "playa mode" where i slept with any skirt that brushed my trousers, after a while i got tired of that life and decided to cool down and really search for that true love. i now know what i want from someone else and how to know am appreciated and cherished. i have always boosted of being one of the good men left and i intend to keep it that way. i love appreciating people and my queen to be will be loved forever.
the problem is finding the right person and its kinda hard with our city filled with gold diggers and ladies just after a good organism. relationship values are not being taken seriously by both sides of gender and one can never be correct about another one. i recently met a young lady and she swept my feet all over sudden. very sincere, full of life, independent, mature even for her age and most importantly she understands herself. i want to know her better but i have my reservations as she does too. she thinks she isn't ready for a relationship whileas i think she is but cant force her or rush things.
it has just donned on me this morning that true love exists and one can easily find it. one has also to overcome the pain and fear to be happy. whoever reads this article should sit back and analyse if they are really happy in their relationship/marriage and if their spouse is worth their time, attention, love and life. life is too short and one needs to enjoy its gifts and blessings.
MARTIN
LOVE can be defined in many ways but it depends on an individual. i was in a four relationship and mennn it was crazy. the normal up and downs were usually there but mostly we were good together and much in love. the real problems started when my partner go a job while i was studying, she never had time and when free she went out with her girlfriends. 3 months down the line i discovered she was cheating on me with her boss (bulgarian). most of her friends knew and never told me or even drop a hint. i had my doubts but i always told myself she would not do that to me because tulikuwa tumetoka mbali.
i came to find out about the affair after she had dumped me via sms, i felt i was at the end of the road and almost killed myself. after being accused of making her miserable by everyone i let it go and hoped one day i would move on. i became a loner because i could share a table with my friends because they knew and never said anything, it took time to heal form the heartbreak and betrayal but i finally let it go.
from their i went into "playa mode" where i slept with any skirt that brushed my trousers, after a while i got tired of that life and decided to cool down and really search for that true love. i now know what i want from someone else and how to know am appreciated and cherished. i have always boosted of being one of the good men left and i intend to keep it that way. i love appreciating people and my queen to be will be loved forever.
the problem is finding the right person and its kinda hard with our city filled with gold diggers and ladies just after a good organism. relationship values are not being taken seriously by both sides of gender and one can never be correct about another one. i recently met a young lady and she swept my feet all over sudden. very sincere, full of life, independent, mature even for her age and most importantly she understands herself. i want to know her better but i have my reservations as she does too. she thinks she isn't ready for a relationship whileas i think she is but cant force her or rush things.
it has just donned on me this morning that true love exists and one can easily find it. one has also to overcome the pain and fear to be happy. whoever reads this article should sit back and analyse if they are really happy in their relationship/marriage and if their spouse is worth their time, attention, love and life. life is too short and one needs to enjoy its gifts and blessings.
MARTIN
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The Six Sixes-HOW WOMEN JUDGE AND CHOOSE MEN THESE DAYS
Getty Images
- What You Need To Know
- Women who are looking for perfect-10 men are judging us based on the Six Sixes.
- Not every guy's car has to have 600 horsepower, but econo-boxes won't do.
- The most important criterion is the one you fear the most.
"Women have come up with a system of their own to weed out the average Joes from the Brad Pitts."You know how men use a scale from 1-10 to determine a woman’s attractiveness? A 10 is a smoking-hot babe a la Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, and a 1 is something that crawled out of a murky Louisiana swamp. Well, women have their scale too, and it’s called the Six Sixes. But unlike men's method, which judges women based solely on their appearance, the Six Sixes evaluates men on their bodies, their income and their ability to…perform.
In other words, women have come up with a system of our own, created to weed out the average Joes from the Brad Pitts. Shallow? Perhaps, but don’t think she’s not judging you. Unless she’s a gold digger and solely out for the cash, most gorgeous, independent women are going for the gold: the crème de la crème of men. Put plainly, we're looking to score as many sixes as we can. The more sixes a girl can score, the better. A ten-incher or a seven-figure salary can make up for a lack in the other departments, but if you’re majorly missing one of the below, you might want to start working on filling in the gaps. Read on for a breakdown of the Six Sixes.
A six-figure salary
These days a six-figure salary isn’t much, but it’s sure as hell better than a five-figure salary. Five figures is fine for your average Joe, but to many ambitious women, five figures screams middle class. A successful woman is searching for someone who can treat her to the finer things in life: last-minute weekends in Paris, vacations in Bali and expensive dinners. But it’s not just about the material things. No matter how equal women become to men, when it’s all said and done, money equals power and masculinity. A man who earns a lot of money can more easily take care of his family. And to a lot of us, that is way sexy.At least six feet tall
It almost goes without saying that taller men are more attractive to women. Six feet is a good starting point; it’s sort of like how guys think of a 36C cup size. Height suggests safety and security. We like to feel small and protected in the arms of our guy. A man who’s two inches taller than us is not likely to make us feel sexy or taken care of. More likely we'll feel like we're hanging out with a friend -- and that is not going to get us hot and bothered Pages: 12
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"A guy who's flabby? Not so much."<< Previous Page
At least 600 horsepower in his car
All right, a guy doesn’t absolutely need a 600-horsepower car. But he does have to drive a car that’s powerful. A Chevy Aveo isn’t going to cut it. A Mercedes, BMW, Lexus or Bentley is a good pick for the fancier girl. For a more laid-back type, an SUV or Audi would be a good choice. But no matter what, station wagons, hatchbacks, minivans, or small budget cars are out if you want to impress Dream Girl.A six-pack abdomen
A six-pack is just an added bonus, but it’s a big one. Sure, a guy without one can be attractive, but there’s nothing more pleasurable than touching a guy who’s hard as a rock. It makes sex that much more fun. Plus, a guy in shape is more likely to go all night. A guy who’s flabby? Not so much.At least six months since last relationship
This is an important one for anyone, male or female. If a woman is looking for a keeper, she’s looking for someone emotionally available, and that means someone who is well over his last relationship and not looking for a quick fix for his broken heart. There’s nothing worse than knowing you are the rebound girl.At least six inches below the belt
This sixth point of the Six Sixes is likely to be the one that makes guys the most nervous -- or the most confident, depending on where they stand. To be fair, not all women need a guy who’s at least six inches. But those women are generally not highly sexual. For the rest of us, a minimum of six inches is essential if we want to get off. Lest you think this is superficial, think again. It’s a matter of basic physics: A larger penis makes it easier to hit the g-spot, therefore making it easier to orgasm. A wider penis causes more friction, which enhances pleasure. So if you’re not packing down below, make sure you’ve got those oral and fingering skills down pat.The bottom line? The Six Sixes are a way for women to measure her man’s virility. If you’re lacking in one of the above, start making some changes -- or settle for being just average.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Signs She'll Make A Bad Wife
- What You Need To Know
- Certain characteristics are warning signs for a troubled marriage down the road.
- Traits like jealousy and flightiness don't disappear after marriage.
- If she wants you to change now, she will still want to once you're married.
"Contrary to the wisdom of pop songs, love is not enough to make a marriage work. "If you’re thinking of asking your girlfriend to become your wife, there are a few things to consider first. Deciding if you’re ready to make the commitment to marriage is only half the battle. Now you must figure out if the woman in your life is the right one to devote yourself to until death do you part. It’s a complex situation, but there are a few warning signs that your girlfriend is not marriage material. Here's some of the most obvious hints that she’ll make a bad wife.
She’s flighty
A woman who has trouble committing to a job, a friendship or even a hairstyle might not be the best person to swear your undying loyalty to. If she has tried numerous short-lived career paths or is constantly making new friends and dropping the old ones, these may be indications that she’s not the kind of girl who’s in it for the long haul. Settling down simply may not be in the cards for someone so free-spirited and fickle.Even if she sticks around, consider the possibility that her ever-changing lifestyle could derail your own life plan as well. Getting married means combining your lives in nearly every sense. Give some serious thought as to whether or not she will be a good influence on your future.
She’s jealous
If your girlfriend is jealous of every girl who comes near you, putting a ring on her finger is not going to make her more secure. Everyone gets jealous sometimes, but if you find yourself constantly having to reassure her that the other women in your life are not a threat to her, this could spell doom for a long-term commitment. A good wife is not possessive or irrational. As long as you’re not giving her any reason to be suspicious, she should be able to keep the green-eyed monster in check.Her sex drive doesn’t match yours
Sex is an important part of any relationship, and the way you relate to each other physically has a big influence on whether you stay together after you say “I do.” One sign that she might make a bad wife is if her sex drive differs wildly from yours. Whether it’s much higher or much lower than your own, her libido will have a huge effect on your happiness as a married couple. Sex-drive issues can be the result of medical or psychological problems, so problems might come and go, but either way, it’s best to work this out before you walk down the aisle.She doesn’t want your friends around
A girl who disapproves of you hanging out with your friends will become a wife who doesn’t want you to have your own life outside of the marriage. Even if she’s not that fond of your buddies, she shouldn't stand in the way of you spending time with them on your own. Provided your friends aren’t convincing you to rob banks or some other objectionable behavior, she should trust you to make your own decisions about your friends. If she tries to restrict that now, it’ll only get worse after you say your vows.She tries to change you
If your girlfriend is constantly nitpicking about your appearance, your behavior, your personality, your career path, your friends, and your habits, she is essentially telling you that you’re not good enough for her. Everyone can make improvements in their lives, and a good partner should help you become a better man, but if she’s forever on your case about changing one thing or another, she’s going to make a bad wife.You also have to decide whether or not the things she’s asking you to change are reasonable or out of the question. Can you give up your vision of a loft downtown for her desire for a house in the suburbs? What if you’ve always wanted to be a father and she is dead-set against having children? Ask yourself how much you’re willing to give up to please her.
Not marriage material
Contrary to the wisdom of pop songs, love is not enough to make a marriage work. Getting married means sharing your entire life with another person, so you want to make absolutely sure that she is someone you’ll be happy spending time with day in and day out. Keep an eye out for these warning signs that she will make a bad wife and avoid committing to the wrong woman.Tuesday, August 9, 2011
5 Steps For Making Her Fall in Love
At some point in his life, EVERY guy wants to fall
in love.
While it's a lot of fun to date different women
and play the field, there will be a time when you
want to go beyond a casual relationship.
In all likelihood, you'll come to the point where
you want to find that special someone.
So how can you make the woman that you want love
you back?
Well here are 5 simple tips to make this happen...
.
~~> Step #1- Know that love is different then
attraction
The one thing you should always remember is
attracting a woman is MUCH different than getting
her to love you.
In other words, it's easy to show a high status
personality to hook her interest.
But it's a lot harder to get her to develop those
lasting kind of feelings that go beyond simple
sexual attraction.
That's why you should show the REAL you that's
hidden beneath the surface.
With love, you have to show FEELINGS and
reciprocate her nurturing nature.
You should allow her to be attracted to the fun
and alpha side of you, but love the good person
you are deep inside.
.
~~> Step #2- Act like a MAN
Real men don't act in a deceptive and fake
manner.
If you want her to love you, you must be worthy
of this love.
This means avoiding all the games that men and
women play during the courtship period.
A real man is good to the woman he's with and
doesn't do anything to hurt her.
Ultimately her love must be returned through
YOUR actions and words.
So if you're into dating multiple women, don't
tell her she's the ONLY one.
In fact, if don't want to settle down, do
yourself a favor and keep her at an emotional
distance.
It'll only end up hurting her feelings if
you're not looking for a committed
relationship.
On the other hand, if you're secretly harboring
feelings for a certain girl, NOW is the time to
DO something about it.
Here's a site that can show you how:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
.
~~> Step #3- Make your intentions evident
I'm going to be honest here...
Women like to think long term!
If you've established yourself in a
relationship, then she's probably thought about
what it'll be like with you on a
permanent basis (ie: marriage).
So if this is something you want in your life,
then your actions should reflect this goal.
In essence you have to act in a way that'll
demonstrate a genuine desire to settle down and
possibly marry her.
To do this, you should bring her around your
friends, invite her to important functions in
your life and basically include her in all
aspects of your life.
.
~~> Step #4- Communicate with her
Communication is to key to developing a loving
relationship.
Unfortunately as a gender we're not known for
our communication skills.
However if you're serious about this woman,
you have to be open about the things which
are going on in your life.
This also means taking a genuine interest in
what she's doing and getting to know her an
intimate capacity.
Furthermore, there will be times when the two
of you will get in an argument.
When these moments happen, you have to remember
she is someone you love, and you shouldn't say
anything which you can't take back.
In other words don't intentionally hurt her
feelings.
.
~~> Step #5- Keep things fun and sexual
One of the obstacles in a relationships is
the "friend trap."
This is when you slowly develop into more of
a friendship rather than a relationship.
Finally you must ensure that your relationship
is still fun and exciting as it evolves.
While most women are looking for a special
someone who can share their feelings, you
can't let things get boring and stagnant.
If you're serious about this woman then you
must WORK to keep things fun.
This means still being a fun, interesting guy
and keeping the romance alive.
So go on exciting trips, buy her presents,
and don't be afraid to spice things up in the
bedroom.
Love is the ultimate goal of a serious
relationship.
If you can make her love you then you'll be on
the pathway towards build an incredible future
with the woman of your dreams.
Talk Soon,
KENYAN LAD
in love.
While it's a lot of fun to date different women
and play the field, there will be a time when you
want to go beyond a casual relationship.
In all likelihood, you'll come to the point where
you want to find that special someone.
So how can you make the woman that you want love
you back?
Well here are 5 simple tips to make this happen...
.
~~> Step #1- Know that love is different then
attraction
The one thing you should always remember is
attracting a woman is MUCH different than getting
her to love you.
In other words, it's easy to show a high status
personality to hook her interest.
But it's a lot harder to get her to develop those
lasting kind of feelings that go beyond simple
sexual attraction.
That's why you should show the REAL you that's
hidden beneath the surface.
With love, you have to show FEELINGS and
reciprocate her nurturing nature.
You should allow her to be attracted to the fun
and alpha side of you, but love the good person
you are deep inside.
.
~~> Step #2- Act like a MAN
Real men don't act in a deceptive and fake
manner.
If you want her to love you, you must be worthy
of this love.
This means avoiding all the games that men and
women play during the courtship period.
A real man is good to the woman he's with and
doesn't do anything to hurt her.
Ultimately her love must be returned through
YOUR actions and words.
So if you're into dating multiple women, don't
tell her she's the ONLY one.
In fact, if don't want to settle down, do
yourself a favor and keep her at an emotional
distance.
It'll only end up hurting her feelings if
you're not looking for a committed
relationship.
On the other hand, if you're secretly harboring
feelings for a certain girl, NOW is the time to
DO something about it.
Here's a site that can show you how:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
.
~~> Step #3- Make your intentions evident
I'm going to be honest here...
Women like to think long term!
If you've established yourself in a
relationship, then she's probably thought about
what it'll be like with you on a
permanent basis (ie: marriage).
So if this is something you want in your life,
then your actions should reflect this goal.
In essence you have to act in a way that'll
demonstrate a genuine desire to settle down and
possibly marry her.
To do this, you should bring her around your
friends, invite her to important functions in
your life and basically include her in all
aspects of your life.
.
~~> Step #4- Communicate with her
Communication is to key to developing a loving
relationship.
Unfortunately as a gender we're not known for
our communication skills.
However if you're serious about this woman,
you have to be open about the things which
are going on in your life.
This also means taking a genuine interest in
what she's doing and getting to know her an
intimate capacity.
Furthermore, there will be times when the two
of you will get in an argument.
When these moments happen, you have to remember
she is someone you love, and you shouldn't say
anything which you can't take back.
In other words don't intentionally hurt her
feelings.
.
~~> Step #5- Keep things fun and sexual
One of the obstacles in a relationships is
the "friend trap."
This is when you slowly develop into more of
a friendship rather than a relationship.
Finally you must ensure that your relationship
is still fun and exciting as it evolves.
While most women are looking for a special
someone who can share their feelings, you
can't let things get boring and stagnant.
If you're serious about this woman then you
must WORK to keep things fun.
This means still being a fun, interesting guy
and keeping the romance alive.
So go on exciting trips, buy her presents,
and don't be afraid to spice things up in the
bedroom.
Love is the ultimate goal of a serious
relationship.
If you can make her love you then you'll be on
the pathway towards build an incredible future
with the woman of your dreams.
Talk Soon,
KENYAN LAD
Thursday, August 4, 2011
How to Become More Charismatic to Women
Let me ask you a question...
Do you want to be more charismatic to women?
Hopefully you answered YES!
The truth is charisma is one of those traits that
can have a HUGE impact on your success with women.
As you've probably noticed, there are some men
who can create attraction with just a few words
and a quick look.
Even if they're average looking, these guys now
the secret to establishing an instant connection.
The question is can you LEARN to be more
charismatic?
Fortunately the answer is yes. But it requires
that you develop a couple of habits.
Here are five ways you can do it:
1- Accept that it can be learned
Before you change things up, you must first accept
that charisma is something which you CAN learn.
If you REALLY don't think it'll work, then you'll
probably fail.
Just understand that charisma is something that
can developed no matter what you're like.
Think about all those famous actors and celebrities.
Many didn't start out as being charismatic.
They have to be coached and trained to improve their
voice, body language and acting.
The end result they were able to transform themselves
into a charismatic person.
.
2- Find your own style
Another way to be charismatic is to learn how to
become your own person.
While it's important to model guys who show a
natural ability, you should learn how to be your
own person and find your own style.
For instance, if you're a naturally quiet person,
then you should develop a calm, confident and
charismatic personality.
Having an attitude like this helps when you're
dealing with one-on-one interactions.
This will be much easier than trying to transform
into a loud and outgoing person,
.
3- Show charismatic body language
Body language is a critical element to becoming
more attractive.
That's why I recommend you take a look at this site:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
A suave person is a guy who can show charisma with
just his presence.
For instance, he has exemplifies many qualities
through his non-verbal communication like:
** Confidence
** A relaxed pose
** Good posture
** A positive expression with a smile
.
4- Be congruent
In order to be charismatic, your words and actions
must match your overall demeanor.
In other words, you need to be congruent throughout
your entire lifestyle.
So instead of trying to "fake it till you make it",
you should work on the things that are holding you
back.
By eliminating your sticking points and become truly
confident in every situation, you'll develop this
magnetic personality trait.
.
5- Be authoritative
When you're talking to a woman, don't be afraid to
show a confidence in your words or actions.
By speaking about topics like an authority, you'll
impress women with your confidence.
So no matter what you say, remember to show
confidence.
In other words, if you act nervous around women,
you won't be showing charisma.
As you can see...Charisma is something that CAN be
learned.
If you take the time to develop these 5 basic traits,
you'll be on your way towards being a charismatic
guy.
Finally, charisma goes hand-in-hand with your basic
*look*.
This is another area where guys struggle.
Frankly, many men display an unappealing look, which
generally repulses women.
The good news is there's something that can help.
Go to this site to learn a few simple ways for
becoming MORE handsome around women:
talk soon
MARTIN MURITHI
Do you want to be more charismatic to women?
Hopefully you answered YES!
The truth is charisma is one of those traits that
can have a HUGE impact on your success with women.
As you've probably noticed, there are some men
who can create attraction with just a few words
and a quick look.
Even if they're average looking, these guys now
the secret to establishing an instant connection.
The question is can you LEARN to be more
charismatic?
Fortunately the answer is yes. But it requires
that you develop a couple of habits.
Here are five ways you can do it:
1- Accept that it can be learned
Before you change things up, you must first accept
that charisma is something which you CAN learn.
If you REALLY don't think it'll work, then you'll
probably fail.
Just understand that charisma is something that
can developed no matter what you're like.
Think about all those famous actors and celebrities.
Many didn't start out as being charismatic.
They have to be coached and trained to improve their
voice, body language and acting.
The end result they were able to transform themselves
into a charismatic person.
.
2- Find your own style
Another way to be charismatic is to learn how to
become your own person.
While it's important to model guys who show a
natural ability, you should learn how to be your
own person and find your own style.
For instance, if you're a naturally quiet person,
then you should develop a calm, confident and
charismatic personality.
Having an attitude like this helps when you're
dealing with one-on-one interactions.
This will be much easier than trying to transform
into a loud and outgoing person,
.
3- Show charismatic body language
Body language is a critical element to becoming
more attractive.
That's why I recommend you take a look at this site:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
A suave person is a guy who can show charisma with
just his presence.
For instance, he has exemplifies many qualities
through his non-verbal communication like:
** Confidence
** A relaxed pose
** Good posture
** A positive expression with a smile
.
4- Be congruent
In order to be charismatic, your words and actions
must match your overall demeanor.
In other words, you need to be congruent throughout
your entire lifestyle.
So instead of trying to "fake it till you make it",
you should work on the things that are holding you
back.
By eliminating your sticking points and become truly
confident in every situation, you'll develop this
magnetic personality trait.
.
5- Be authoritative
When you're talking to a woman, don't be afraid to
show a confidence in your words or actions.
By speaking about topics like an authority, you'll
impress women with your confidence.
So no matter what you say, remember to show
confidence.
In other words, if you act nervous around women,
you won't be showing charisma.
As you can see...Charisma is something that CAN be
learned.
If you take the time to develop these 5 basic traits,
you'll be on your way towards being a charismatic
guy.
Finally, charisma goes hand-in-hand with your basic
*look*.
This is another area where guys struggle.
Frankly, many men display an unappealing look, which
generally repulses women.
The good news is there's something that can help.
Go to this site to learn a few simple ways for
becoming MORE handsome around women:
talk soon
MARTIN MURITHI
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
5 Rules for Dating Multiple Women
For many guys dating multiple women seems like a
dream come true!
At first it seems like it's lots of fun hanging
out with different girls and having a guaranteed
supply of sex.
Each night you can pick and choose who you want
to see.
Bu there is a dark side to dating multiple women...
If you're not careful, it can destroy your life.
When you're dating different women, you're
multiplying your risk of something going
completely wrong.
That's why it's important to know the right way
to juggle your dating partners.
I believe in a following a few simple tips when
you're trying juggle a few girls at the same
time.
Specifically you should follow these FIVE simple
rules...
.
1- Be truthful
The first rule for dating multiple women is the
hardest.
It's simple. Just be honest and tell each girl
that you're dating other women.
Have you ever heard the famous expression:
"Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned?"
Well this definitely true when a girl feels like
you've been lying to her. The truth is dating
multiple women can cause a LOT of problems in
your life.
If you're lying to women and not telling them
that you're dating other girls, then BAD things
will happen if you're caught.
Trust me on this one.
My advice is to be honest to every woman you're
dating. Just explain that you're not ready to
settle down and you like to go out with other
girls.
While some girls won't want date you, they'll
at least respect your candid nature.
.
2- Be in control
Dating multiple women involves a bit of work
and effort.
When you're out with a different girl every
night, you have to make sure you're a master
juggler.
Now in order to avoid dropping any balls and
messing things up, you have to be in complete
control of your dating life.
Go here and watch this video that discusses
how to MASTER your dating life and meet the
*kind* of women you want to date:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
For instance, you should be the one to set
up the dates, control where you go and decide
when to talk.
You want to control the situation so you can
"pencil in" each girl without being obvious
about your dating habits.
.
3- Set standards
It's a weird psychology, but women are
attracted to men who are pre-selected by
other girls.
By demonstrating you're a selector instead
of the selectee, women will treat you
differently from other guys.
To show a "strong" personality you must
set a strict code standards in your life
and let women know about them.
Then if a girl you're dating breaks a rule,
let her know you won't tolerate her actions.
If she's a repeat offender, then you ditch
her.
Dating multiple women is about having the
freedom to walk away from toxic women who
can destroy your life.
Set some standards and force women to follow
them!
.
4- Show them respect
Now dating multiple women isn't always about
what you want.
There are a lot of women who don't mind dating
"a player", but they don't appreciated being
disrespected.
No matter what, treat ALL women well and don't
make them feel like they're being used.
You can do this simply by calling them back,
treating them like gold on your date and ensure
that each has a chance to go out with you on
important nights (Friday & Saturday).
.
5- Know how to find new girls
Typically when you've dated multiple women for
awhile, you'll have some who transition out of
your life.
It's a simple truth that some women want to
be in a committed relationship or need more
from a guy.
So be prepared to stop dating some women.
My advice is to remain friendly to the women
you've dated. You never know when things might
change and you want her back in your life.
Also she might have cute friends. ;-)
Now in addition to being friendly to past
girls you've dated, it's also important to
find new women to go out with. So always keep
your eyes out for new women!
Here's a great place that shows how to quickly
find the EIGHT types of women:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
Dating multiple women requires a high level of
multi-tasking.
If you don't know how to date multiple women,
then bad things can happen to you.
All you have to do is follow these five rules
and you'll find it's easy to date multiple women!
Talk Soon,
martin muriithi
dream come true!
At first it seems like it's lots of fun hanging
out with different girls and having a guaranteed
supply of sex.
Each night you can pick and choose who you want
to see.
Bu there is a dark side to dating multiple women...
If you're not careful, it can destroy your life.
When you're dating different women, you're
multiplying your risk of something going
completely wrong.
That's why it's important to know the right way
to juggle your dating partners.
I believe in a following a few simple tips when
you're trying juggle a few girls at the same
time.
Specifically you should follow these FIVE simple
rules...
.
1- Be truthful
The first rule for dating multiple women is the
hardest.
It's simple. Just be honest and tell each girl
that you're dating other women.
Have you ever heard the famous expression:
"Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned?"
Well this definitely true when a girl feels like
you've been lying to her. The truth is dating
multiple women can cause a LOT of problems in
your life.
If you're lying to women and not telling them
that you're dating other girls, then BAD things
will happen if you're caught.
Trust me on this one.
My advice is to be honest to every woman you're
dating. Just explain that you're not ready to
settle down and you like to go out with other
girls.
While some girls won't want date you, they'll
at least respect your candid nature.
.
2- Be in control
Dating multiple women involves a bit of work
and effort.
When you're out with a different girl every
night, you have to make sure you're a master
juggler.
Now in order to avoid dropping any balls and
messing things up, you have to be in complete
control of your dating life.
Go here and watch this video that discusses
how to MASTER your dating life and meet the
*kind* of women you want to date:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
For instance, you should be the one to set
up the dates, control where you go and decide
when to talk.
You want to control the situation so you can
"pencil in" each girl without being obvious
about your dating habits.
.
3- Set standards
It's a weird psychology, but women are
attracted to men who are pre-selected by
other girls.
By demonstrating you're a selector instead
of the selectee, women will treat you
differently from other guys.
To show a "strong" personality you must
set a strict code standards in your life
and let women know about them.
Then if a girl you're dating breaks a rule,
let her know you won't tolerate her actions.
If she's a repeat offender, then you ditch
her.
Dating multiple women is about having the
freedom to walk away from toxic women who
can destroy your life.
Set some standards and force women to follow
them!
.
4- Show them respect
Now dating multiple women isn't always about
what you want.
There are a lot of women who don't mind dating
"a player", but they don't appreciated being
disrespected.
No matter what, treat ALL women well and don't
make them feel like they're being used.
You can do this simply by calling them back,
treating them like gold on your date and ensure
that each has a chance to go out with you on
important nights (Friday & Saturday).
.
5- Know how to find new girls
Typically when you've dated multiple women for
awhile, you'll have some who transition out of
your life.
It's a simple truth that some women want to
be in a committed relationship or need more
from a guy.
So be prepared to stop dating some women.
My advice is to remain friendly to the women
you've dated. You never know when things might
change and you want her back in your life.
Also she might have cute friends. ;-)
Now in addition to being friendly to past
girls you've dated, it's also important to
find new women to go out with. So always keep
your eyes out for new women!
Here's a great place that shows how to quickly
find the EIGHT types of women:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
Dating multiple women requires a high level of
multi-tasking.
If you don't know how to date multiple women,
then bad things can happen to you.
All you have to do is follow these five rules
and you'll find it's easy to date multiple women!
Talk Soon,
martin muriithi
Thursday, July 21, 2011
5 Ways to Sexually "Turn Off" Women
I looked at her like she was crazy.
About a month ago, I was engaged in a deep
conversation with a female "friend" of mine.
The topic was what "turns on" women.
My point was a guy should focus on pleasing a
woman.
She on the other hand, had the viewpoint that
guys should be ONLY concerned with eliminating
the behaviors which can "turn-off" a woman:
Well after arguing for half an hour, I realized
she had some valid points.
In fact, I came to the conclusion that all guys
can learn a lot about what turns off women.
If you can avoid them, you'll take
that crucial first step towards pleasing a
woman.
So with that in mind, here are FIVE of things
that REALLY turn off women:
.
1- Bad hygiene
Seriously, women hate when guys smell or have
poor hygiene.
Before you even think about hopping in the
sack, you should make sure you've showered
and don't smell like you've run a marathon.
In addition, it's important to do the proper
maintenance actions like shaving, applying
deodorant, cleaning your ears and brushing
your teeth.
.
2- Being a poor kisser
Women love guys who can kiss with passion.
The converse is they hate guys who either act
too wussy or too aggressive when they kiss.
This means if your kissing skills lack a
punch, then you'll probably disgust her.
If you want to turn her on, it's important
to find out how to kiss and work hard at
applying this technique.
.
3- Acting like a wimp
The simple truth about sex is women want
to be with men who act like MEN.
If you're acting like a wimp in the bedroom,
then you're turning her off. Wussy behavior
involves asking her if "she's enjoying
herself" or being too afraid to try new
things.
.
4- Acting too aggressive
Now being too aggressive is just as bad
as acting like a wimp.
When you try to push a woman around you'll
display disgusting behavior.
If she thinks you're only concerned with
your own pleasure, then she won't enjoy
sex with you.
While women want men who act confidently,
you should NEVER get too aggressive
with a woman.
.
5- Rushing things
Women love the entire process of sex.
To them, the build up and foreplay is as
just as important as the main act. So if
you rush through things, you'll probably
turn off your woman.
To make a woman enjoy herself, you should
take your time and focus on her pleasure.
With that said, I recommend you go HERE
to learn how turn her on:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
Honestly, there is a lot to be learned
about women's sexuality.
If you can eliminate (or never display) the
five behaviors I just listed in this article,
you'll discover it's easy to become one of
the BEST lovers she's ever had!
Talk Soon,
MARTIN
About a month ago, I was engaged in a deep
conversation with a female "friend" of mine.
The topic was what "turns on" women.
My point was a guy should focus on pleasing a
woman.
She on the other hand, had the viewpoint that
guys should be ONLY concerned with eliminating
the behaviors which can "turn-off" a woman:
Well after arguing for half an hour, I realized
she had some valid points.
In fact, I came to the conclusion that all guys
can learn a lot about what turns off women.
If you can avoid them, you'll take
that crucial first step towards pleasing a
woman.
So with that in mind, here are FIVE of things
that REALLY turn off women:
.
1- Bad hygiene
Seriously, women hate when guys smell or have
poor hygiene.
Before you even think about hopping in the
sack, you should make sure you've showered
and don't smell like you've run a marathon.
In addition, it's important to do the proper
maintenance actions like shaving, applying
deodorant, cleaning your ears and brushing
your teeth.
.
2- Being a poor kisser
Women love guys who can kiss with passion.
The converse is they hate guys who either act
too wussy or too aggressive when they kiss.
This means if your kissing skills lack a
punch, then you'll probably disgust her.
If you want to turn her on, it's important
to find out how to kiss and work hard at
applying this technique.
.
3- Acting like a wimp
The simple truth about sex is women want
to be with men who act like MEN.
If you're acting like a wimp in the bedroom,
then you're turning her off. Wussy behavior
involves asking her if "she's enjoying
herself" or being too afraid to try new
things.
.
4- Acting too aggressive
Now being too aggressive is just as bad
as acting like a wimp.
When you try to push a woman around you'll
display disgusting behavior.
If she thinks you're only concerned with
your own pleasure, then she won't enjoy
sex with you.
While women want men who act confidently,
you should NEVER get too aggressive
with a woman.
.
5- Rushing things
Women love the entire process of sex.
To them, the build up and foreplay is as
just as important as the main act. So if
you rush through things, you'll probably
turn off your woman.
To make a woman enjoy herself, you should
take your time and focus on her pleasure.
With that said, I recommend you go HERE
to learn how turn her on:
==> http://www.chickmagnet101.com/
Honestly, there is a lot to be learned
about women's sexuality.
If you can eliminate (or never display) the
five behaviors I just listed in this article,
you'll discover it's easy to become one of
the BEST lovers she's ever had!
Talk Soon,
MARTIN
Friday, July 15, 2011
5 Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics You Must Know (*CONTROVERSIAL* Content)
[1: LEAD ARTICLE] 5 Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics You
www.boyfrienddestroyer.com
==============================
[2 - READER Q&A] "Email Seduction - How To Make It Work?"
==============================
Note: If you'd like to send us a question, be sure to indicate your
first name (or a pseudonym if you wish) and where you come from.
Thanks!
Hey Derek,
I really like the email seduction technique which you sent (TRL #121 -
==============================
[3: SPECIAL FEATURE] "How To Seduce Asian Women - In 3
How to Seduce Asian Woman
LAD
Must Know
==============================
By Benjamin Damien, The "Boyfriend Destroyer Guru" (Click Here)
Say, you meet a girl and she's wonderful. In fact, you think that this IS
==============================
By Benjamin Damien, The "Boyfriend Destroyer Guru" (Click Here)
Say, you meet a girl and she's wonderful. In fact, you think that this IS
the special woman that you've been waiting all your life.
Then, she utters that dreaded line...
"I have a boyfriend."
I'm sure that you have encountered this scenario, and you wondered
how you could get this woman to ditch who she calls as her "boyfriend"
Then, she utters that dreaded line...
"I have a boyfriend."
I'm sure that you have encountered this scenario, and you wondered
how you could get this woman to ditch who she calls as her "boyfriend"
and come into your arms. But how are you gonna do it?
Don't worry, we've got your back! In this issue of TRL, I'm going
to share with you exactly how to make a woman who is already
attached to leave her boyfriend for you. We have previously covered
some Boyfriend Destroyer techniques, but in this issue, we'll talk
about the 5 definitive "Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics" that would
turbo-charge your seduction powers in no time:
Ben's Top 5 Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics
#1: The "Your BF Is Awesome" Tactic. Here's a sneaky way to
Don't worry, we've got your back! In this issue of TRL, I'm going
to share with you exactly how to make a woman who is already
attached to leave her boyfriend for you. We have previously covered
some Boyfriend Destroyer techniques, but in this issue, we'll talk
about the 5 definitive "Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics" that would
turbo-charge your seduction powers in no time:
Ben's Top 5 Boyfriend Annihilator Tactics
#1: The "Your BF Is Awesome" Tactic. Here's a sneaky way to
make a woman feel that her boyfriend is sorely inadequate. Talk about
how AWESOME her boyfriend is, and then exaggerate it until it sounds
virtually impossible to happen. This would make her subconsciously
think if what you say is true... and most of the time it would fall SHORT
virtually impossible to happen. This would make her subconsciously
think if what you say is true... and most of the time it would fall SHORT
of her expectations.
For example, say. "You two look like you'll grow old together, and
have a bunch of great kids!" If he's the kind of guy who happens to
be reluctant of settling down, then she would question his long-term
For example, say. "You two look like you'll grow old together, and
have a bunch of great kids!" If he's the kind of guy who happens to
be reluctant of settling down, then she would question his long-term
commitment to her in her mind. Yes, it's darn sneaky.
To make this work, you MUST sing praises of her boyfriend. Avoid the
To make this work, you MUST sing praises of her boyfriend. Avoid the
mistake of trying to bash her boyfriend. This would make her feel
defensive, and she would get the urge to speak in SUPPORT of
him. Another bad mistake is to try to CONVINCE her that you're the
better deal. It never works, and it makes you look like a desperate
loser. Use reverse psychology... see the next tactic below.
#2: The "Reverse Psychology" Tactic. Tell her that you would make
him. Another bad mistake is to try to CONVINCE her that you're the
better deal. It never works, and it makes you look like a desperate
loser. Use reverse psychology... see the next tactic below.
#2: The "Reverse Psychology" Tactic. Tell her that you would make
a horrible boyfriend if you two would ever hook up. Tell her that she
would never want to have someone like you as a boyfriend. This is one
variation of the "Disqualifier" tactic... which I am going to share with you
next.
#3: The "Disqualifier" Tactic. Constantly tell her that things won't
#3: The "Disqualifier" Tactic. Constantly tell her that things won't
work out between both of you. Keep making excuses... and make them
"weak" on purpose. The purpose of disqualifying yourself is to make
yourself unpredictable... and make her keep trying to figure you out.
This way you'll be able to keep her feeling intrigued and interested to
find out what you really think about her.
Some sample disqualifier lines -
- "It's a shame that we can relate to each other so well... because
I've decided NOT to get a girlfriend for at least a year."
- "You remind me of my first crush... we were so passionate, but it
was just so... wrong."
- "We'd be horrible together. We'd just spend days and nights in
bed, and we won't do anything productive."
#4: The "Future Projection" Tactic. Future Projections are stories
(which are perhaps somewhat unrealistic) involving you and her which
Some sample disqualifier lines -
- "It's a shame that we can relate to each other so well... because
I've decided NOT to get a girlfriend for at least a year."
- "You remind me of my first crush... we were so passionate, but it
was just so... wrong."
- "We'd be horrible together. We'd just spend days and nights in
bed, and we won't do anything productive."
#4: The "Future Projection" Tactic. Future Projections are stories
(which are perhaps somewhat unrealistic) involving you and her which
takes place in the future. This works well in seduction (especially in the
case of boyfriend destroying) because it shows a woman that you live
in a reality so strong that she wouldn't be able to resist you.
It's difficult to fully describe this tactic so we'll get into the details in
It's difficult to fully describe this tactic so we'll get into the details in
the next few issues of TRL. Meanwhile, understand that it would be
easier to pull this trick off if you use Derek's Dark Rake Method. What you'd
need to do is to describe a future situation (e.g. "Imagine we are far
away in a deserted island...") and then ENHANCE the experience
using the Strawberry Fields Forever inside the 2nd manual of the
Dark Rake Method.
#5: The "Value Elicitation" Tactic. Ask her to imagine and describe
her IDEAL boyfriend... and do it as vividly as possible. When she does
#5: The "Value Elicitation" Tactic. Ask her to imagine and describe
her IDEAL boyfriend... and do it as vividly as possible. When she does
this, she would be subconsciously comparing what she imagines as ideal
with her actual boyfriend. Remember...you want to plant ideas in her
mind that her boyfriend falls short of what she wants... and she deserves
better.
With these 5 techniques, you will come off as the "better deal" when
With these 5 techniques, you will come off as the "better deal" when
compared to her boyfriend. If you combine these with the legendary
Boyfriend Destroyer Routines, girlfriend snatching would indeed become
laughably easy to you.
Check out the full Boyfriend Destroyer system here -
Check out the full Boyfriend Destroyer system here -
www.boyfrienddestroyer.com
==============================
[2 - READER Q&A] "Email Seduction - How To Make It Work?"
==============================
Note: If you'd like to send us a question, be sure to indicate your
first name (or a pseudonym if you wish) and where you come from.
Thanks!
Hey Derek,
I really like the email seduction technique which you sent (TRL #121 -
July 18th, 2010 issue).
I didn't realize that I was making the mistake as I tried to apply the
I didn't realize that I was making the mistake as I tried to apply the
Dark Rake Method (particularly the Yin & Yang routine in the Manual 2).
I know I need to make my emails short... but I'm having problems making
them work for me. Any tips on how to seduce a woman over email?
- Ruck, Florida
Derek says:
Hey Ruck, here's the deal. I always exclusively use text over email at the
- Ruck, Florida
Derek says:
Hey Ruck, here's the deal. I always exclusively use text over email at the
START, but if you prefer using email then follow this tips:
1. TAKE IT SLOW. Women hate to be rushed into things... and that's
really unlike us guys who could get aroused by the flick of a switch.
1. TAKE IT SLOW. Women hate to be rushed into things... and that's
really unlike us guys who could get aroused by the flick of a switch.
When you email her, don't reveal everything, and always end your email
with a "cliffhanger" ending. Which would then prompt her to email you
back to find out more...
2. DESCRIBE THINGS VIVIDLY. If you're going to ask her out,
2. DESCRIBE THINGS VIVIDLY. If you're going to ask her out,
then describe the date... as detailed as possible. Tell her about the
place... the atmosphere, the sights and smells. Ask her what she'll be
wearing...in detail. When you do this, you'll do a mini "Future
Projection" attraction technique on her (see the previous article) - and
trigger deep level attraction in her.
These two little tricks should get you going, but if you want the whole
enchilada on using emailing (or messaging on Facebook) to attract women,
then download the Online Dating Playbook. It's required reading for all
my clients - in this day and age there's no way any guy can avoid having to
interact with women online. Fact.
==============================
[3: SPECIAL FEATURE] "How To Seduce Asian Women - In 3
Easy Steps"
==============================
I've noticed that of late, a huge number of guys are writing in to TRL,
==============================
I've noticed that of late, a huge number of guys are writing in to TRL,
sharing 'problems' they were having when it comes to dating & getting
Asian women.
And I don't blame them.
It *is* a REAL problem at this day and age because it's true...
Asian women are tremendously difficult to understand. The way they view
And I don't blame them.
It *is* a REAL problem at this day and age because it's true...
Asian women are tremendously difficult to understand. The way they view
dating, love, marriage, and romantic relationships are completely different
than that of Western cultures.
Knowing little, knowing close to nothing about their culture, their language,
Knowing little, knowing close to nothing about their culture, their language,
their roots, it's really no surprise most men get knocked out... BAD.
If you want specific techniques and strategies for you to get yourself that
If you want specific techniques and strategies for you to get yourself that
enchanting, slender & LOVING Asian girl you've always wanted, then
read on...
Step #1: Know The Gatekeepers.
It's very important for you to start building "gate keeper" relationships.
Step #1: Know The Gatekeepers.
It's very important for you to start building "gate keeper" relationships.
This means making AAF's (Asian Female Friends) who will then give
you access to more Asian women. You probably won't be having sex
with any of these AAFs. Their function will be to introduce you to their
cute friends and get you into their social circles.
When Asian women go out, they tend to hang together in groups, and
it can be extremely hard to "penetrate" the group and introduce yourself
When Asian women go out, they tend to hang together in groups, and
it can be extremely hard to "penetrate" the group and introduce yourself
when you don't know any of them. The best possible way to meet a
beautiful Asian girl is to be introduced to her by one of her friends who
knows you (and "vouches" for you as a good guy).
Step #2: Read The Signals.
When I was in graduate school, I had cute classmates from Japan, China,
Step #2: Read The Signals.
When I was in graduate school, I had cute classmates from Japan, China,
Singapore, Taiwan and Thailand come to my crappy little on-campus
apartment to study with me.
I thought they just wanted to study; I didn't want to creep them out by
I thought they just wanted to study; I didn't want to creep them out by
trying something sexual. But now I realize that they were totally up for
sex. Otherwise, they wouldn't have been hanging out at my apartment
until midnight. It was an unusually aggressive move for an Asian woman
to invite herself to my place to "study" at night.
But I didn't read the signal-- so we would study, and she would go home.
But I didn't read the signal-- so we would study, and she would go home.
If only I'd read the signals and "escalated" with these girls (read the
"Secrets Of Dating Asian Women" book for more information on this
process).
Follow up on all hints of interest in a polite and focused manner. If she
Follow up on all hints of interest in a polite and focused manner. If she
says "you should come see my house sometime," don't just say "yeah,
OK, let me know when you want me to come by." Tell her you can
come by on Saturday or Sunday, and ask her which is better for her.
Make a plan. Don't blow your chance.
Step #3: Love them and they will love you back with great
Step #3: Love them and they will love you back with great
intensity.
If an Asian woman is extremely beautiful by the standards of her
society, then of course guys are going to kiss her ass and treat her
If an Asian woman is extremely beautiful by the standards of her
society, then of course guys are going to kiss her ass and treat her
like a princess. But that's only 1% or 2% of Asian women. The rest
are often severely lacking in self-confidence. If she's past her mid-
twenties and still single, she may be afraid that she'll never find a man.
Where she comes from, women are held to an extremely high standard.
The point is, by loving the Asian woman that you are with at the
The point is, by loving the Asian woman that you are with at the
moment and giving her your complete attention, you will make her feel
extremely special. This means keep your cell phone turned off, hold
her hand in a proud way when you walk with her, pay for everything,
be polite and respectful, and tell her the little things about her that you
find cute or sexy. (Her laugh, her smile, her hair, the way she walks, etc.)
If you're reading this right now and you would like to learn more 'secrets'
If you're reading this right now and you would like to learn more 'secrets'
on how to get an Asian woman to come home with you AND come inside
with you after a date, how to get her "turned on", and how to smoothly
take things to a "physical level" in a way that she'll enjoy, then you should
check this out:
www.therakeletter.com/
... because inside, you'll uncover *hundreds* more ideas on how to do so.
www.therakeletter.com/
... because inside, you'll uncover *hundreds* more ideas on how to do so.
You can download it right now, and be reading it in a few minutes... Just
go here -How to Seduce Asian Woman
LAD
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
7 reasons why women cheat
You’ve probably heard that men cheat for physical reasons, women for emotional reasons. Sure, there’s some truth to that, but when we asked real women around the country to share why they strayed from their boyfriends, we learned they had a whole host of explanations — from bad kissing to sheer revenge. Read on for the truth about why women have given in to temptation.
Reason #1: There’s no passion
“I had been with John for about three years — he was a really nice guy, and I enjoyed being with him, but there wasn’t a ton of passion. Most everyone we knew had gotten engaged, and though John would have proposed in a second, whenever he brought it up, I’d change the subject. I took a trip to Australia for work and while I was gone, I got together with a coworker to whom I’d always been insanely attracted. I had a fantastic trip, probably because for the first time in a long time I experienced that excitement I’d been missing. I broke up with John soon after I returned home and began dating the guy from the trip. Even though I’m not super-proud of my actions, things ended up for the best: after dating for a few years, the guy from the trip and I got married and we’re incredibly happy together.”
– Giselle, 30, Montvale, NJ
Reason #2: To delay a breakup
“Right before I was going to break up with my ex, Sean, he found out that he had to put his beloved dog to sleep. He was so broken up about it that I didn’t have the heart to end things, so I waited a month or so until he was in better shape. When things seemed to be better and I was ready, he lost his job, so I felt like I was back to square one! By that time I had met someone else that I really wanted to start seeing, so I went ahead and did it. I eventually ended things, never telling Sean about my extracurricular dating. I think I rationalized that I was trying to spare his feelings.”
– Stacy, 30, Lexington, KY
Reason #3: Because absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder
“My boyfriend Greg and I decided to do the long-distance thing after I was accepted to a graduate program 200 miles from where we lived. The first few months were fine, but I soon found myself becoming extremely attracted to my lab partner, Henry. What began as innocent flirting eventually wound up with us getting physical. After the program was over, I returned home to Greg. Being with him was really difficult, but I didn’t break up with him initially because I was still attracted to him, too. I visited Henry a few times and realized that he was really more of a fling, probably done out of boredom, and that Greg was the one for me. I eventually stopped communicating with Henry. I never told Greg about what happened, which occasionally makes me feel guilty, but I chalk my cheating up to being young and silly. He and I are still together, four years after my program ended.”
– Tamara, 33, Portland, OR
Reason #4: To avoid being left out in the cold
“I began dating Eric shortly after I had been dumped by Dave, my boyfriend of two years. I was devastated and Eric was definitely a rebound thing. After Eric and I had dated for five months, Dave came back and wanted to give things another shot. I still really missed him, so I began seeing him, but never ended things with Eric. I think I sort of kept Eric around for insurance purposes, just in case things didn’t end up well with Dave. Dave and I didn’t make it on round two, and after Eric discovered through mutual friends that I had been seeing him again, he ended things with me. I definitely learned my lesson about dating two guys at the same time, not to mention trying to rekindle a relationship that’s just plain over.”
– Jen, 28, Oak Park, IL
Reason #5: To make a break from a bad relationship
“When I was younger, I dated a guy named Ethan who was really critical of me. He constantly made little snide comments about my weight, how stupid I was and how clumsy I was. For whatever odd reason, I was into him, despite the fact that all of my friends and family hated him. One weekend when he was away, I met Will at a party and we completely hit it off. He was the complete opposite of Ethan — kind, sweet and generous, yet completely cool and fun, too. We hung out all weekend and it was like a light bulb went off in my head: This is how mature, relationship-worthy guys act. I kissed Will the night before he left and broke up with Ethan soon after. Will and I dated for three years and now we’re married.”
– Allison, 30, New York, NY
Reason #6: To find that missing piece
“I’m from Florida, so I adore going to the beach and boating, but my former boyfriend, Chris, a total city boy, hated it. We always argued about where we’d take trips, and he always won. About eight months into our relationship, I took a trip to Key West with my friends and we chartered a boat for the day. The captain of the boat was this totally hot, complete ‘beach guy for life’ type, and I spent the whole day flirting with him. We met him out that night and spent time alone together. I never told Chris about it after I got home and I never felt guilty; I think part of me felt like that’s what Chris got for being so stubborn! Chris and I didn’t make it, and after we broke up, I made sure any future boyfriends loved the beach!”
– Lizzie, 32, Chicago, IL
Reason #7: To give him a taste of his own medicine
“My last boyfriend was a total player before we got together. I thought I could change him but I was wrong. I always heard rumors that he was seeing other girls while we were dating, but he always denied it. One night, I got a call from a girl he had been secretly dating, and she detailed their three-month-long relationship to me and told me about another girl she had discovered he was seeing as well. I was so mad that I went out with my friends that night, dressed to kill, and spent time with the most attractive guy; I felt like it was the least he deserved! I loved seeing the look on his face when I told him about what I did and that I knew about the other girls. And then I dumped him!”
– Ashante, 25, College Park, GA
Reason #1: There’s no passion
“I had been with John for about three years — he was a really nice guy, and I enjoyed being with him, but there wasn’t a ton of passion. Most everyone we knew had gotten engaged, and though John would have proposed in a second, whenever he brought it up, I’d change the subject. I took a trip to Australia for work and while I was gone, I got together with a coworker to whom I’d always been insanely attracted. I had a fantastic trip, probably because for the first time in a long time I experienced that excitement I’d been missing. I broke up with John soon after I returned home and began dating the guy from the trip. Even though I’m not super-proud of my actions, things ended up for the best: after dating for a few years, the guy from the trip and I got married and we’re incredibly happy together.”
– Giselle, 30, Montvale, NJ
“Right before I was going to break up with my ex, Sean, he found out that he had to put his beloved dog to sleep. He was so broken up about it that I didn’t have the heart to end things, so I waited a month or so until he was in better shape. When things seemed to be better and I was ready, he lost his job, so I felt like I was back to square one! By that time I had met someone else that I really wanted to start seeing, so I went ahead and did it. I eventually ended things, never telling Sean about my extracurricular dating. I think I rationalized that I was trying to spare his feelings.”
– Stacy, 30, Lexington, KY
Reason #3: Because absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder
“My boyfriend Greg and I decided to do the long-distance thing after I was accepted to a graduate program 200 miles from where we lived. The first few months were fine, but I soon found myself becoming extremely attracted to my lab partner, Henry. What began as innocent flirting eventually wound up with us getting physical. After the program was over, I returned home to Greg. Being with him was really difficult, but I didn’t break up with him initially because I was still attracted to him, too. I visited Henry a few times and realized that he was really more of a fling, probably done out of boredom, and that Greg was the one for me. I eventually stopped communicating with Henry. I never told Greg about what happened, which occasionally makes me feel guilty, but I chalk my cheating up to being young and silly. He and I are still together, four years after my program ended.”
– Tamara, 33, Portland, OR
Reason #4: To avoid being left out in the cold
“I began dating Eric shortly after I had been dumped by Dave, my boyfriend of two years. I was devastated and Eric was definitely a rebound thing. After Eric and I had dated for five months, Dave came back and wanted to give things another shot. I still really missed him, so I began seeing him, but never ended things with Eric. I think I sort of kept Eric around for insurance purposes, just in case things didn’t end up well with Dave. Dave and I didn’t make it on round two, and after Eric discovered through mutual friends that I had been seeing him again, he ended things with me. I definitely learned my lesson about dating two guys at the same time, not to mention trying to rekindle a relationship that’s just plain over.”
– Jen, 28, Oak Park, IL
Reason #5: To make a break from a bad relationship
“When I was younger, I dated a guy named Ethan who was really critical of me. He constantly made little snide comments about my weight, how stupid I was and how clumsy I was. For whatever odd reason, I was into him, despite the fact that all of my friends and family hated him. One weekend when he was away, I met Will at a party and we completely hit it off. He was the complete opposite of Ethan — kind, sweet and generous, yet completely cool and fun, too. We hung out all weekend and it was like a light bulb went off in my head: This is how mature, relationship-worthy guys act. I kissed Will the night before he left and broke up with Ethan soon after. Will and I dated for three years and now we’re married.”
– Allison, 30, New York, NY
Reason #6: To find that missing piece
“I’m from Florida, so I adore going to the beach and boating, but my former boyfriend, Chris, a total city boy, hated it. We always argued about where we’d take trips, and he always won. About eight months into our relationship, I took a trip to Key West with my friends and we chartered a boat for the day. The captain of the boat was this totally hot, complete ‘beach guy for life’ type, and I spent the whole day flirting with him. We met him out that night and spent time alone together. I never told Chris about it after I got home and I never felt guilty; I think part of me felt like that’s what Chris got for being so stubborn! Chris and I didn’t make it, and after we broke up, I made sure any future boyfriends loved the beach!”
– Lizzie, 32, Chicago, IL
Reason #7: To give him a taste of his own medicine
“My last boyfriend was a total player before we got together. I thought I could change him but I was wrong. I always heard rumors that he was seeing other girls while we were dating, but he always denied it. One night, I got a call from a girl he had been secretly dating, and she detailed their three-month-long relationship to me and told me about another girl she had discovered he was seeing as well. I was so mad that I went out with my friends that night, dressed to kill, and spent time with the most attractive guy; I felt like it was the least he deserved! I loved seeing the look on his face when I told him about what I did and that I knew about the other girls. And then I dumped him!”
– Ashante, 25, College Park, GA
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